I look for You in a Strangers Smile

I’ve talked to the stars since I can remember… about my life, hopes, dreams, family and friends. I am still doing this.

Each day I am on an adventure. I still cannot believe that. I’ve spent many extra hours sleeping this week  and I hate to do it when there is this new world below my feet (but I must need it).

I’ve had many adventures. I have to start keeping a memo pad so that I can remember everything I want to tell you! (notes/letters are called memos here)

I have since taken my FIRST train ride, EVER. My friend took me to Kobe by train, where I gave in and bought a camera (instead of a sewing machine). You might not know this…but I am using an Iphone 4 to communicate and it is about on its last leg. Did you know people still had Iphone 4s?! I need to invest in a newer form of communication next. In Kobe we spent the day walking around, seeing magnificent views, shops and best of all I had the company of a wonderful friend. You can tell I am a foreigner on the train because I am the only person that has to hold on! 🙂 Kei also took me to explore a seashell museum and that is where I had my first sighting of the ocean (which is mostly called the sea here). This person has been the best guide, showing me new places and exploring things for the first time herself. We have laughed together, prayed together and explored.

After this adventure I spent a day at a coffee shop in the mall. I spent hours writing letters and addressing envelopes. Check your mail 🙂 I’m still walking/riding to get lost until I am confidently finding my way around. I’m getting better. I’ve got a map that I mark where I am and where I’ve been.

A wonderful friend has taken me out to eat squid legs, raw fish and lots of other very new foods [FOR ME]. Noriko has also taken me to see my first movie here in Japan and ordered me my first beer! Thank you for being such an incredible human, Beautiful Angel 🙂

Yuko is a beautiful woman that lives here in Japan. She has shown me around the mall, come over to my home and invited me into hers. I got to have dinner with Yuko and talk for hours with her. She has so much personality and is warm like a ray of sunshine. She is the most talented, kind, genuine person with a heart big enough for each person she meets.

I’ve seen the ocean TWICE and touched it once. It was the warmest water I have ever felt. The ocean is just as refreshing for the soul as I remember. Sachiko told me she finds comfort in the ocean because it is the only body that connects all of us. I’m pretty sure she is my soul sister. I never know how people take when I tell them that…because being my soul sister might be kind of scary 🙂 My friends are at the ocean in the states right now…and this water connects us. That is kind of a magical thought. Sachiko too, is the kind of person you want to be around and she is always making me laugh. Pretty special person-with plenty of sparkle to spread.

I have to stop going to see my friend at the pet store. He has been there since I arrived in Japan. I would be his mom in a heart beat-but I cannot have pets here…and I have my Sawyer back home.

 

It makes me too happysad to see this pup at the store day in and day out. As a child I would go into the pet store and look at all the animals. I would stop in front of them and promise them that they would find a happy and loving home. I promised this little guy he would find a home.

(UPDATE: Because this blog has taken me about a week to write….I went back 4 days later, today, and HE HAS FOUND A HOME)! More HAPPPPPPPPPYlittlebitsad

The other night when I went to dinner a family got up and moved after I arrived…which made me think it was because of me.The other day as I sat at the mall watching people walk by…I felt this overwhelming sadness/loneliness. A person was going to sit by me…but a seat opened up and he choose to move to that seat. As I sat at the mall watching people walk by…I existed in a world where nobody knew me, loved me, and life at that moment would be the same for those people with or without me. I felt like that puppy at the pet store. Maybe that’s why I cannot stop visiting him and why it makes me so happy sad. When I am still watching people and life move…that is the only time I feel lonely. Not when I lay in bed tossing and turning, or eat meals alone…Some people find peace in being still, but that is where I find loneliness.

I know, I am enough so I can allow myself to feel these brutal feelings because right now I am finding my place in a new world. I can be whoever I want here…but I choose me.

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This bowling pin!!! I had to add it. At home there use you be this Shilo Inn sign right off of the second ave freeway exit. You could see it on the freeway from a ways back. That sign was how I knew I was almost home. It was my landmark since I was little. This is my landmark here. Once I’ve got eyes on this-I know I am almost home!! It’s my first and favorite landmark so far 🙂

I’ve found the ocean…my next adventure will be to the mountains…or maybe Osaka? I guess the adventure is not knowing what my next step will be.

Think about you all everyday. I made a wish/prayer at a Shrine for the first time. You write down your wish/prayer and hang it up. I love this and I think I will do it often. Be filled with happiness and health. IMG_0232_edited

illie

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